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How can I master my emotions?

 

How can I master my emotions?

”Between stimulus and response there is a space.
In that space is our power to choose our response.
In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

Viktor E. Frankl

Eating right, sleeping enough and being active is great but what about your thoughts and emotions – how are you doing on that side? You have probably noticed that you have to feel good inside or no ”outer” success gives you real and lasting pleasure.

Emotions have profound effect on our health, relationships, work contribution, creativity and even our perception. Studies after studies have proven this but why do so many people still avoid learning and facing their emotions and thoughts? As many things in life: when you stop to see the truth, it is easier than you thought.

Here is how it is done.

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1. Stop and become aware

You cannot master something you don’t even know is there.

The first and very important step is to become aware of your emotions and thoughts. It’s surprising how often our brains (because they want to save energy) just go on autopilot and follow ready made schemas (processes) and we do not stop to wonder if certain situations are in our best interest. So the first step is to stop and notice. What is happening and how do I feel about it? Do I feel good or bad? Is this an emotion or a thought? Just stop to notice.

2. Identify emotions in more detail

Over 90% of highly successful people have high emotional intelligence and the most important aspect in emotional intelligence is your ability to identify and name emotions. Is the negative emotion you’re feeling e.g. sadness, envy, hate or stress? Is the positive emotion e.g. joy, gratitude, euphoria or satisfaction?

Seeing things in more detail is like putting more light in to the room: instead of seeing ”something”, you begin to see details that makes everything much more manageable.

3. Confess

It is one thing to notice what’s going on inside of yourself but the real effects come from confessing these feelings ”outside of yourself”: to tracker, paper, friend, colleague, healthcare professional etc. Then you are able to separate yourself from the emotions and thoughts, get more perspective and analyse them more easily. Also something amazing happens, proven by research: positive emotions get stronger when shared and negative emotions get milder.

4. Take action

We often get caught up in our inner emotions and thoughts too much. When you do the process mentioned above, you often understand that emotions and thoughts give you important information that should be wisely taken into account without need to deny them or over excoriate. What does your emotions tell you about your environment? What gives you pleasure and joy? What anxiety and stress? Through what actions can you change the situation?

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This is our passion. To make emotions understandable and functional so that individuals can use the power of emotions to their advantage and make better decisions in their lives. For this process we have created Emotion Tracker – an easy- to-use tool that helps you in this identification of emotions and thoughts. We launched in January 2014 through healthcare professionals in Finland: therapists, doctors, nurses and coaches give Emotion Tracker to their patients and customers as a tool that support their process. In late 2014 we also opened our webshop where consumers can buy Emotion Tracker for themselves.

Camilla Tuominen is a passionate CEO and co-founder of Emotion Tracker. More about her thoughts can be found in her presentations in SlideShare, in Youtube and  she also hosts a radio-show about emotions in worklife at Radio Rapu

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